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:iconmute-banshee:

~Mute-Banshee

Looking for a Painter Partner
About Me Member Digital Painter Mute-BansheeFemale/Netherlands Recent Activity Deviant for 5 Years
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20,931 Pageviews

Quitting Roleplay?

Mon Jun 29, 2009, 3:43 AM
  • Mood: Defeated
  • Listening to: Mushishi OST
  • Reading: nothing fancy
  • Watching: Mushishi
  • Playing: Nothing
  • Eating: Lemon Candy
  • Drinking: Tea
At this point I’m seriously questioning whether I should even try to do any PBEM/forum roleplay anymore.

Given the facts, the last time I wrote a post was somewhere in January, and in about a year I posted less than 20 times in all my accumulative rpgs (not that there are that many really) making is not even 2 posts a month, maybe I should just let go.

One rpg I haven’t even posted in at all and I signed up at the end of December….it makes me feel terrible.

I’ve been wondering for a while what it is. Why haven’t I been writing, and truth be told I have hardly been writing for 1.5 years now.

Yes I’ve been busy, aren’t we all? Some are busy but still manage to write. Is it just a question of commitment?
But when I truly think ‘I should just quit’ I swing into a full-fledged rebellion. I don’t want to quit completely because I love these characters and the rpgs and folk that wander there, and yet I can’t manage to keep in the story either. I’m afraid to jump in because I know I’ll most likely be gone again in a few weeks when things get tough and I need to concentrate all my energy on my priorities.

So what is it? I realized it’s just a ban I put there for myself. As long as I’m not done with college, I can’t write and feel good about it and I can’t put in that extra effort I would otherwise. As a matter of fact I feel so bad writing it tends to be exhausting.
I did write for a personal story last week or so. And it took me a lot of effort not to feel too bad about it, but I still did. I feel like I have to defend and explain everything I do for fun.
It’s the same thing with gaming. Some people seem to have the idea I game all the time while I most definitely don’t. In the past 6 months or so I have played 3 games. Of which I completed one (but sometimes with about 3 weeks between the last gaming session and 3 hours in a row tops) and two others which I only played for a few hours, not counting the DS, I must admit, which I spend some time on during train-rides and after hours when I’m already in bed or the occasional Sunday at mom’s, but half of the time I play educational games on it anyway so that doesn’t really count ^_~

Well my thesis is almost done, finally, but then I’ll be gone for a good while, or rather, that’s the plan, though financially, that’s not coming together either, and then there’ll be moving to a new home (well that’s a big maybe, but it still gives me tension) and finding a job (D: ! ) and pulling my hair over finances anew no doubt. So basically, won’t that cycle just start all over again?

*sigh*

I’m really a bit at a loss here.

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Devious Info

  • Current Residence: Utrecht
  • Interests: Comics (mostly Euro) Manga, Yaoi/June, Games, fashion, Samba and Tallships!
  • Favourite movie: Amélie, Spirited Away, O Central do Brasil, Sin City, Hornblower, 2046, Hero, Prince of Egypt
  • Favourite band or musician: Duffy, Muse, Hide, Placebo, Sarah McLachlan, Lisa Gerrard, David Gray, Clara Nunes, Aphrodite,
  • Favourite genre of music: Britrock/J-rock, Drum & Bass, occasional club, samba & Jazz etc.
  • Favourite artist: OM, Bilal, Yslaire, Samura, Gaiman, Artgerm, ImperialBoy, Noah-nk, Tobiee, Radojavor, Zhu-Zhu etc!
  • Favourite poet or writer: Joao Guimaraes Rosa, Paulo Coelho
  • Favourite photographer: Erwin Olaf, Rinko Kawauchi, Anton Corbijn
  • Favourite style of art: Many
  • Operating System: A pc now, actually. Oh. Blasphemy.
  • MP3 player of choice: Itunes
  • Shell of choice: /
  • Wallpaper of choice: Frequently changes, often original art.
  • Skin of choice: /
  • Favourite game: Devil May Cry series,Zelda, FF, Guitar Hero, Oblivion, Prince of Persia, Fallout3, Sims *lol*
  • Favourite gaming platform: Ps3, Wii, PC
  • Favourite cartoon character: Dante, Lady, L, Tifa, Toren, Spider, Jubisale, Drakenian, Prince of Persia, Steef, my own OCs
  • Personal Quote: Als het leven geen zin heeft maakt het maar zin
  • Tools of the Trade: Photoshop, Painter and traditional media

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Comments


ô_o Waarom watch ik jou niet. Tssss... :heart:

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:heart: Visit OpenMinded! [link] :heart:
[link] <<<--- I was tricked! Tricked, I tell yoou~!
He~y >w< *clings to you here too* ♥♥♥♥

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Hey Mute Banshee. Thanks for the Fav!!!

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"If you're Damned if you Do and Damned if you Don't
....Better to be Damned that you Did"
Thomas M. Thomson

my websites:
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thank you for the watch!

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Website - [link]
:aww:Thanks for the fave!:love:

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"By the pricking of my thumbs, something wicked this way comes."
thanks for the :+devwatch: :aww:

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My gallery [link]
My website: [link]
Cya! :D :aww: :wave:
thanks for having an open mind
:hug: Thanks for the :+fav:s, Gin!

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My new account: ~MichelleMH
Thanks for adding my mohawk to your favorites. I'm glad you liked it. =]
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Well you have a good point :XD: Maybe I should watermark it, however much I dislike that thought.

Yes the lips were too much ne...I figured that too. Still not the way he really looks like, but it's better now :XD: thank you!

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Second Star to the Left

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